There are those days of pure hate because they are not like they use to be. I will always love you and I will always cherish our memories.


Do you know what sucks about coming out of a 3 year relationship? Everything. You end up with nothing but hate and anger towards yourself. You don’t get anything out of it. She ends up with better, she ends up with everything she ever wanted, she ends up with everything you ever put your effort into. And do you know what I get? Nothing. I get ignored, hated on, looked at the wrong way, a torn heart.
I can’t even come out with it ending on a good note. Not even a you will be fine ,stay strong or any sought of naturing/comforting advice from the person who you meant the most to, from the person who once told you that I will never let you go, from the person that once said to me you are the one for me, especially the one who promised forever. And where is forever? It’s no where. I’m stuck here with emptiness, and you are on top of the world. Why can’t you just be mature and act like an adult about this because I’m being ever so nice. But I’m just trying for nothing. The drugs you do are probably getting to your head. The people you talk to are probably just putting words in your mouth. I mean who fuckings cares what we had, what we shared and what we did because what does it represent now, what does it show now, nothing. Absolutely nothing. You be happy, you be proud, you feel on top of the world. Because what does the person you left out on his lonesome with a cold heart you once made warm feel? nothing. He never will. I ask for the simplest things in life but nope everything has to be your way. Thank you for tearing this poor innocent caring sweet kind hearted special guys heart apart. I hope you feel fine and mighty about it.
You laugh at me, you laugh when someone asks about me. Because when i get asked about you, the first thing I will say is, “she was the best thing that ever walked into my life”. I promise you that. I promise you that I would hold you closer then ever before if you came back into my life.
I look past all the sleeping around, the abuse, the fights, why because it was nothing compared to how much you made feel. You made me feel loved, special, warm and you were always there for me. I expected the same thing back, but all you looked at was my flaws, everything bad. You never looked at my bright side and who I really was and how much I cared. On the inside I will fight for what I once had but on the outside I won’t show any emotion.
all I ask is for one simple request, is that we somewhat be friends. No anger, no hate, no ignorance. Because I think it’s fair that because you have everything and I have nothing that I get this. I still see you as a big part of my life whether you are there or not. You can move on, marry another guy do whatever you like but please all I ask is to be friends. That doesn’t mean text you everyday, that’s means I will ask how you are or how everything is every once in a while, like I havnt even heard about your ps test and that hurts considering how happy I was for you. So please that’s all I ask out of this. Ignore it all you like, it will not make you a better person, if you agree to being friends it will show me how mature you can be. Love always Jay.

I don’t think you know this but you have completely wrecked me more then I ever wrecked you. It would be really nice if you good give me some sought of advice or help me be able to move on, tell me how you manage to do it, with that new guy. because I don’t know how you arnt struggling after the 3 years. please get me up on my feet and tell me how to do this. I’m so lost. And if it was anyone that could help me it would only be you because you seem to know how to let go so easily. And you are the only person I can talk to about this stuff because you know me, know who I am and how I work. Tell me what to think and do and I should be okay. That’s all I ask bambimaccas :) at least then I get something nice out of this. I hope you respond. bambimaccas

I never really dream big, but I did have a dream to marry the prettiest girl on the planet. But now she is gone. Time to crawl back into a shell like I use too.

Okay, this is shit, I miss our sex and it’s doing my head in. I think if we did it one last time, I bet you would feel close and connected again. But I don’t think you want to… 😒

I put so much trust in you, trusting you to stick with never letting me go, trusting you to go by everything you say and want with us. But it all ends up back in my face. I just want what you said to still be true and not it meaning something at the time.

I put so much trust in you, trusting you to stick with never letting me go, trusting you to go by everything you say and want with us. But it all ends up back in my face. I just want what you said to still be true and not it meaning something at the time.

Having showers together then dropping our towels afterwards to have passionate sex 👌😞

I wanted our life to be a book, not a chapter. I would do anything to have you back

I miss panda and cookies adventures. I miss everything. I don’t want another guy picking you up off your feet. You were my special girl, I admit I was protective of other guys trying to talk to you but i had my reasons. You say you think you will just get hurt again or keep hurting me but I don’t want to hurt you anymore and I promise if we both put our minds together and work on it we can do this. I just want to be happy with you.

I pray every night that you would just turn around and be the girl I know and tell me it’s okay and tell me that you miss me and everything we did.
I’m hoping god will bring us together again. I can’t live without you, I really can’t.

FUCCCCKKK!!!!! Why did I have to be such a horrible person unintentionally. 😢

Arghhhh! I want to shoot myself :’( if I didn’t screw up, I treated you nicely, show you off, I would still be there.
You wouldn’t really be associated with other guys asking for sex or doing a drug.
I just want the real you back 😞😔😢😭

Is this all so crazy to you? Is it scary that it had to come to this? I mean not long ago we were cuddled up in bed being cute and happy and then all of a sudden it comes to this. Does that not shock you like would have you ever expected it. Does it hurt at all, I mean after everything absolutely everything it is now like this. What was your plan with us? What did you want? I’m not a bad person I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.
Can you explain to me what I really had to do for it to not come to this? Because right now I’m really scared, I’m really upset and I absolutely hate myself to bits. You were everything and my life to me. If I could of would go back months ago and be a better person and make you happy. I just wanted you to trust me and believe in me.
Right now you are probably listening to other people saying you can do better you don’t need him. When you once told me you could never let me go, you could never leave me. We were meant to be. I just wish there was something in you that would make me happy again, giving me one last opportunity to show you how a girlfriend should be treated. Scared because the next girl I think I’m just going to end up hurting, she won’t understand me like you did.
I can’t do this, I really can’t. I wish you would understand that. Please give me some sought of sign or hope that I would have with you in the future. I miss you, I love you, you were the best person to ever walk into my life. I don’t know if you know this but I really wanted to get on one knee for you.
Please don’t throw me away for good. At least still talk to me and tell me how you are. I would do anything for you to still be apart of my life somehow, I do to care how just please. This is the first time I’ve ever been so upset, I’ve ever begged and fought so much. Please.

Relevant. @bambimaccas

Relevant. @bambimaccas